So, I tried Milk Paint

A while ago I tried chalk paint.  I couldn’t understand why everyone loved it so much.  Was it really that different from regular paint?  Would I put down my paint sprayer in favor of it?

In short, no.  It’s awful and should only be used by those who really like that “DIY” I-painted-this-myself look.  Chalk paint touts that no primer is required, it’s easy to paint in a coat or two, and a little goes a long way.  I found none of that to be true, despite trying every technique I could find online and first-hand accounts from friends.  I found it to be a great deal more work than spraying (and I’m including sprayer set-up & clean-up here) for a result that can really only go “shabby chic” –– not my style at all.  I seriously can’t stand “distressed” furniture.  Please stop ruining furniture, people.  Basically, I should have used primer and serious hand-sanding sanding is needed between every coat.  I used a high-end chalk paint.  Gross.   I diluted it.  I used the right brushes.  I used a clear wax by the same brand.  It’s okay for the cheapo armoire that is my temporary coat closet.  We only wear coats for a few months in Texas.  White blends into the background in my house.

Thankfully, chalk paint is basically old news for Pinterest and blogs.  I hope it’s old news for otherwise beautiful furniture on Craigslist as well.  So.  Many.  Ruined.  Pieces.

Now, “Milk Paint” is all the rage, especially the not-technically-milk-paint milk paint by The General.  I’ve used their gel stain and liked it.  I thought I’d give it a try.  I watched their YouTube videos.  I read advice from other bloggers.  I got advice from the amazing store where I bought it from which usually gives great advice.  Their best advice would have been to not bother, but they suggested a foam brush (counter to most advice).  I drove my tiny $18 can of paint back from the far away store and tried it out.

Based on advice, I peeped the surface by light sanding and cleaning.  I used mineral spirits because that’s what I’m used to.  Don’y use 409, that’s for amateurs.  They recommend rubbing alcohol.  Keep it simple, stupid (remember that from science class?).  I was using a drawer from a desk I’m painting with a light-colored stain finish.  I put a thick coat on and let it dry.  It dried quickly.  The oil-based Zinsser primer I like to spray takes a couple hours, this took 30-45 min.  My trusty old sprayed primer would then be ready for a quickie sanding & cleaning and then a single coat oil-based enamel.  This looked like my 4 year old had painted it so I lightly sanded.  Then I put another coat on, this time diluted with water.  It dried even faster, in about 20 minutes.  The brush strokes were back, but not as bad.  So I sanded and painted a diluted coat again.  More brush strokes.  At this point, I would be spraying an oil-based enamel which takes almost no time at all, but a good 20-30 minutes of clean-up afterward and another 6-8 before top coat (usually while I sleep).

I lost count of coats.  And days,  Then decided that despite the nice, milky look to the paint, that I should have stuck to what I do best and just sprayed the darn thing.  I would have had the entire desk finished in the time I was spending sanding and re-painting one tiny drawer.  So I sanded one last time to get it ready for “real paint”.  This is where, for the first time, it actually looked nice.  If you’re into distressed furniture.  I am not.  But if I was, I could just slap a coat of water-based poly on it and be done.  After days of sanding, painting, and repeating.

On the bright side, I still have a ton of that teeny, tiny $18 can of paint left.  For what, I don’t know.  I really hate sanding.  Milk paint means sanding.

So, before I can actually show you the before and after of this project, I’ll be prepping this desk for a “real” paint job.  The way the pros do with a paint sprayer, mineral spirits, oil based primer, oil based enamel, and a clear poly top coat for durability.

Why do we keep trying to re-invent the wheel?  Your kitchen cabinets look great and stand up to abuse for a reason.  Learn to paint like a painter if you want a long-lasting, brushstroke-free, professional-looking finish.  Or stick to spray paint, if you spray a clear top coat on top, it won’t look like a spray paint job (want to see one of mine?).

Subscribe or follow me on Facebook (be sure you have notifications on) to see how I re-finish this desk like the high-end painters we use on our multi-million dollar homes.